Opinionated-Mufasa 『EXOtics』

Instead of usin’ my name, I’ll be using my nickname online and that is Mufasa. And No, I am not the sexy brother of Scar from the ‘Lion King’ who died from a stampede. Anyways, what I wanted to rant ’bout is EXOtics (EXO fans) personality. Right, so if yer sensitive and EXO-obsessed type psycho-path fan, ye have no place here. Get out! If ye don’t know EXO, please click this. They’re basically a South Korean-Chinese boy group. A KPOP thing.

I, personally listen to EXO songs and I can name all their members, I can name who sings and stuff; However, I don’t call myself an EXOtic or a fan of ’em because, I don’t know, I just don’t self-acclaim something, if I call myself a fan, I make sure that I love all the members, the group itself without being biased at all. They have this motto, catch-phrase or introduction, whatever ye call it ‘WE ARE ONE, WE ARE EXO’. That being mother-fucking said, if they are ‘one’, shan’t we or you, as a fan, support every member? I don’t get why fans have to be obviously biased like when EXO M performed ‘What is Love?’, the fans (I’m not gonna generalize all) only chant ‘Lu Han! Lu Han!’. What the fuck is this? Why call yerself a fan when you only idolize or like or love Lu Han. Dafuq is dat? I personally think that Chen needs more limelight, he should be given the right credit because HE performed perfectly the high note. He’s the responsible for this singing and shit and he’s, I think, 90% voice of EXO M so I don’t get why there fans are so blind and deaf. Lu Han is my ‘bias’ in EXO M because he’s the first one I saw from e’m, I don’t blame him but it’s just that, SM, be fair for the other members, Kris, Lu Han and Tao aren’t the only members. Xiumin and Chen aren’t Chinese at all, shan’t ye give ’em something that they deserve? It’s fucking hard to study Chinese, I know that it’ll take me 4 years and so on to learn this language because it’s really fucking hard.

I’ll continue with the EXO M, there’s Lay who is popular when he was a trainee, I don’t get why fans bring up his past, his trainee life when he doesn’t even want to go back with it and he doesn’t want the rest to know ’bout it, that’s some bullshit. Him dancing Nobody of Wonder Girls and fans start to make photo-shopped pictures of him and make fun of it and it comes to an extent of being offensive. Unicorn, his symbol is a unicorn. Unicorns poop rainbows and cutesy things that I detest, glitters and shiny shimmery splendid’ and Ugh~ Do they think that’s the unicorn SM is pertaining to? Shouldn’t it mean more cool or something? Why associate it with some cute shits? Why call him a Unicorn when his name is LAY? Does he have a horn on his forehead? Fans are getting pointless and think that there down points are comedic. They seem not to grasp the point that it’s actually not cute. Don’t forget about the good ones people, don’t!

The Baozi thing and Chen is christened as a Duckie. Xiumin doesn’t like being called Baozi but for the sake of getting popular, he has to deal with it, making fun of his cheeks, they’re just making him insecure how puffy his cheeks are. He is 22, do ye think that he likes being called Baozi? For Chen, again, he is getting flack for the beautiful chin of his. I can’t believe this so-called fans, Are you really their fans? You must be fucking perfect for teasing others. God must’ve created yer fucking face flawless. I won’t be surprise if you look more shit than a dog’s shit. The funny thing ’bout this is, most people who has the nerve to bad-mouth with someone’s appearance are the ones who are shittier. 말도안돼! Is Kris that OH-SO PERFECT? That skycraper bitch face. I am not his anti- It’s irony.

For K, HA! Thought I won’t rant something ’bout ’em. Well, here I go

Suho, he is my ideal type, I have mentioned it before. First of all, why call him Grandpa? Kris, Lu Han and Xiumin are older than him right? Y call him Grandpa? For real though, Apba Suho is fine but Grandpa? He’s 21! Unless he has grandchildren. He is not a freakin’ grandfather, OKAY? Calling him Guardian Suho is redundant though so it’s up to you but PLEASE STOP calling him Grandpa GRANDMAS!!! AHJUMMAS!!! Those who are older than Suho who calls him Grandpa, I pray ye’ll be exorcise and throw in an island where Velociraptors live. For the teaser, fuck that, Suho, D.O. & Baekhyun, who else? I’m too lazy, so ’em, they only appeared for one teaser. They have 23 teasers but they only appeared for 1 TEASER. Dafuq is that. Y on EARTH? Suho trained for almost half of his life, then he only get this? He’s the lead/main singer and his talent is wasted? I’m pissed, thank you.

Ah, let’s see, Kai, the face of the group. Really B Really, I didn’t know that HE is the face of the group because I personally think that all of the members could be the face. Anyways, he is my bias, because he’s the 1st one who appeared in the teasers, he appeared for fucking 7 (or so) teasers. WTF? He is an awesome dancer, whene’er I watch him dance, it’s really OSM, from point of it feels like his dance has life or something. He choreographed most teasers (some dances don’t fit the song though but Kudos for the effort) Y BE DAMN SO UNFAIR? One of their performance (EXO K only) he wears a blue jacket when the rest are wearing white. Like really? He must be lost, he must not be a part of that group. I don’t care if I’m getting offensive but I don’t know how to sound unoffensive when it’s the damn truth. Should I rant on his designer or his wardrobe? Scold it until it’s ears bleed? I can’t decipher whether to feel mad or to pity over him, I think he’s enjoying it, either way, his heck face is getting on my nerves and I can’t fucking take it anymore. Life is unfair, deal with it. Bitch shut the fuck up, the only fucking wrong with him is y’know, How could ye be so.. numb? Why let all this atrocity be taking place? No one from them has sense of Justice!

For the maknae, Sehun, I can’t believe what I just read before that he’s the most abused (I don’t know if sexually or something related) member. Talkin’ bout the History Dance Practice, some fans are making fun of his bulge. I cannot believe it. And a picture of him doing a fella-fella what? Whatever term is it that has something to do with sexually something-something. I was like damn, what the fuck is wrong with this dirty ass jokes, wait, first and foremost, this is not a joke because jokes are suppose to be funny. No one deserves this greenish or yellowish acts, no one! This is harassment, no one is allowed to touch someone without permission. Hell! We are on earth and we have fucking laws and bills, Why do that? Are you even a human? Stop this, stop it you horny bastards! Keep your perverted fantasies to yourself. Also making fun of his lisp, it’s not cute. Ye bad-ass bitches!

Lastly, for Chan Yeol, he underwent for Lasik eye surgery, meaning he should stay away from brightness, lights. Paparazzis will blind him soon and if that mother-fucking happens, I’ll allow North Korea’s missiles to hit those uncivilized people. Don’t wait for that tragic thing to happen because I’m serious, I mean it. If I COULD only invent a camera without flash, and the fuck is that, speaking of, aren’t there cameras without flash? Y still do it on purpose when they know he is not allowed to expose himself to lights? I could go down with all Whys? But I am getting lazy. I need a break and a Kit-Kat… EXO, God bless you, GOD BLESS YOU! I’ll be praying for you and yer family. Waiting 5ever for yer Comeback so there could be more videos and mp3s on my PSP.

I have nothing to say ’bout D.O & Baekhyun because I don’t know, they seem just quite and yeah… D__________O I am done so thank you for reading this long essay. Thanks for the time! God bless you! No Ask Kingsley 2day ㅠㅠ BUT there’s something to look forward on Wednesday, KINGSLEY SPOILS BREAKING DAWN PART 2!


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